30 Days of Truth

<br /> <a href="http://ladii-aponte.blogspot.com/2010/08/30-days-of-truth-day-01.html/"><img border="0" src="http://i22.photobucket.com/albums/b305/Dinayda/Truth1.png" border="0" alt="My Wee View" width="125" height="125" /></a><br />

Heres The List If you want to Join The Fun!

Day 01 → Something you hate about yourself.

Day 02 → Something you love about yourself.

Day 03 → Something you have to forgive yourself for.

Day 04 → Something you have to forgive someone for.

Day 05 → Something you hope to do in your life.

Day 06 → Something you hope you never have to do.

Day 07 → Someone who has made your life worth living for.

Day 08 → Someone who made your life hell, or treated you like shit.

Day 09 → Someone you didn’t want to let go, but just drifted.

Day 10 → Someone you need to let go, or wish you didn’t know.

Day 11 → Something people seem to compliment you the most on.

Day 12 → Something you never get compliments on.

Day 13 → A band or artist that has gotten you through some tough ass days. (write a letter.)

Day 14 → A hero that has let you down. (letter)

Day 15 → Something or someone you couldn’t live without, because you’ve tried living without it.

Day 16 → Someone or something you definitely could live without.

Day 17 → A book you’ve read that changed your views on something.

Day 18 → Your views on gay marriage.

Day 19 → What do you think of religion? Or what do you think of politics?

Day 20 → Your views on drugs and alcohol.

Day 21 → (scenario) Your best friend is in a car accident and you two got into a fight an hour before. What do you do?

Day 22 → Something you wish you hadn’t done in your life.

Day 23 → Something you wish you had done in your life.

Day 24 → Make a playlist to someone, and explain why you chose all the songs. (Just post the titles and artists and letter)

Day 25 → The reason you believe you’re still alive today.

Day 26 → Have you ever thought about giving up on life? If so, when and why?

Day 27 → What’s the best thing going for you right now?

Day 28 → What if you were pregnant or got someone pregnant, what would you do?

Day 29 → Something you hope to change about yourself. And why.

Day 30 → A letter to yourself, tell yourself EVERYTHING you love about yourself

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Now Onto My Days

Final Day "30 Days of Truth" 

Day 30 → A letter to yourself, tell yourself EVERYTHING you love about yourself 

Dear Beautiful, 

Through The years You Have Grown, Changed Your Crazy ways, Gotten Married, and Brought Life Into this world. With All your faults You are a great mother. You are always thinking of your Family First, Including Your Mom Dad Brother and Sister. You are always Trying to help people out, and striving for better things and to have a better life. You don't settle with what You have, You want more. All the crazy, Irresponsible, and Bitchy Things You did Made you Who You are today. I Love How You are Big enough to Overlook all the harm others have Done and Live as if it never happened, There is no use in Putting that burden on yourself when those people probably aren't even thinking about it. I Love How you don't care What others Think, Not Just about you, But also about what you do, How you Look, or how you believe your son should be raised. I love Your Intelligence and thirst to learn More. You put Your dreams on Hold for your family and have again started on the slow track to making them a reality, and soon enough will be on the fast track. I love how In all this time You haven't Lost sight of what you want. I Love Your want to try new things. To others you may just be Indecisive, But those who know you, Know that You are just too ambitious to just want to settle for one thing. You see beauty In Most things, and Love to capture that through photography, You love color and try to incorporate that in all things that you do. I Love how you aren't afraid to speak your Mind, and tell it how it is. I love how when Others think something Might not look right on you, you don't give a fuck, Because its not how they all see you or how you look but how you feel and think you look in what you are wearing. I Love how you try and play little silly games with Jayden no matter where you are, How everytime you leave the house Carlos and Jayden are always on your mind. I love the small gestures that You do like bringing them Home a piece of candy cuz you know they will just LOVE it. Through all the Bumps, Hard Times, Financial stress, and Crazy Years, I am proud to say I LOVE THE PERSON YOU HAVE BECOME AND THE PERSON YOU SEEM TO BE BECOMING EACH DAY! 

Love Always,

The Onli Person who knows you as well as You know Yourself ;)

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Day 29 → Something you hope to change about yourself. And why.

I Hope to Finish My Degree and become a Proffesional. I love being with my LO and Taking care of my home but If it means a better life for Us and No worries for LO later im all for Making that Proffesional Cash, I dont want him to have to worry about not having enough for college like I did!

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Day 28 → What if you were pregnant or got someone pregnant, what would you do? 

It would be a surprise to me If I were Preggo Not a Bad one just an unexpected surprise. i would be excited! I did want to wait until 2011 To TTC but If its Gods will I get preggo sooner I will gladly accept my little blessing! 

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Day 27 → What’s the best thing going for you right now?

Right Now The best Thing Is This Move! Todays Meeting will determine the Move and When we come back from our Long 1 day Road trip I am Hoping that This Answer will Be OUR MOVE!!! 

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Day 26 → Have you ever thought about giving up on life? If so, when and why?

Giving Up On Life Yes ending My life Not that I can remember. There have been times when I have felt so overwhelmed with what has been happening, when I lost Angels My first thought was WHY? my 2nd one was HOW? and then I Just didnt want to deal with anything Just wanted to be left alone I slept and Just didnt want to be bothered and just as suddenly as they were Gone I decided that Crying wouldnt Bring them back I never got to meet them but They Lived Inside of me, so it hurt just as badly, and Surely My angels and God Sent me a Little Miracle to help ease My pain! Hes My Little Turtle!
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Day 25 → The reason you believe you’re still alive today.

Um because My Mom Decided to Have me! [ Im only joking but that is a HUGE contributing factor!] I believe Im still alive today Because I have not yet accomplished all i am supposed to in this Life time, god has a greater plan for me and until I fulfill his  Plans I will remain a part of this earth

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Day 24 → Make a playlist to someone, and explain why you chose all the songs. (Just post the titles and artists and letter)

Ok So since I really dont feel Like taking the Time in making a playlist for one person even the Mr. cuz then I have to explain each song and such I mean How many Love songs could I put lol unless its one i was angry with Him haha i decided i would make a playlist with different songs for different people! 

Playlist

I knew i loved You- Savage Garden 

My Wish For you- rascal Flatts

God bless the Broken Road- Rascal Flatts 

One in a million- Hannah Montana 

I loved her First-Heartland 

Mama- Spice girls

Si Una vez- Selena 

Watch me Burn- Eminem Ft Rhianna 

Temporary Home- Carrie Underwood 

Stay-Sugarland 

So Done- Jeanie Ortega 

Crowded-Jeanie Ortega 

Jayden
I Knew I loved You- Savage Garden
My Wish for You-Rascal Flatts

I never thought of the song by savage Garden as anything more than a stupid Love song. another song written for girls, Until you came along! That song Turned into something else, and infact I knew I loved you before I met You I loved You long before you were inside of Me well atleast the Thought of You having you holding you kissing you and spnding everyday of my life with You, I hope that In life you strive to be all that you can be and more to never settle even when you have accomplished all you were seeking I hope you are as ambitious as mommy and always keep wanting more! I Love you Turdle!

The Mr. 

God bless the Broken Road- Rascal Flatts 

One in a million- Hannah Montana 

After All the Losers I went Through I finally Got you to think that you were there right beside through Most of that and I couldnt See you as Much more I thank God that I found you.

Baby Through all Your Faults... you are the one person who keeps me sane! I need you just as Much as You need me. you complete me. Im like the thunderstorm and your the Sun that Comes out after a rainy Day! Although I may always be in control I can say You are one in a million! To be able to handle me My mood Swings and My Random yelling, You are the best. You are MY one in a Million T.Q.M 

Lisa 

Stay-Sugarland 

We have a very Special Friendship! There for eachother when we need it but know when to keep away so we dont get sick of eachother. Through the vents of Stalkers , Ex boyfriends Wives, and the that Tranny looking one especially... Our Friendship Has Only Been proven strong! You and I Both fell for some stupid Lies military Guys Say and Games they play But You Fell For Him as I sent mine packing to his wife and you have endured so Much Pain IM Just Glad You finally heard the rest of the Song and got around To Kicking His ass to the curb! 

Jeremy 

So Done- Jeanie Ortega 

I gave Too Much and got Nothing In return lies, Games, and More Lies. I put everything into Us and all you did was take. You were a Great lesson Learned! You were a Stepping stone! 

Andy 

Crowded-Jeanie Ortega 

After finding out You were taken I sent you back to your Mrs. But still came around with your If ands and Buts [ No Thank You] Another stepping Stone to My Path to happiness and learning to Appreciate Mr. Right 

Suzana 

Si Una vez- Selena 

Watch me Burn-Eminem Ft Rhianna 

I hope One day You learn to value yourself For what You are worth! I know right Now You are gone TRYING to do whats best to be away from this guy [reson for the first Song] but Your last 3 or 4 years has been Nothing But Emotional verbal and physical abuse from a guy who Isnt Man enough To face you when he has done wrong {Like when You showed up and the Heffa was in his room} 

Monica 

Temporary Home- Carrie Underwood 

You were there when i first moved to VA Beach When i dated that First Disaster who helped me realize how fortunate I was to Have Mr. Right I have watched You Struggle with finding Your self a Place in this world, Your Life Hasnt turned out the way you Planned But You have Come so far from that first day i met You at Heathers And let You borrow Maha to go to the boardwalk You were the best Roomie Ever! I Love you and Alyssa 

Daddy 

I loved her First-Heartland 

Oh daddy... How hard it was to See me grow Up and leave you! I can still see it in your eyes when You Look at the Mr. the thoughts that cross Through Your mind ["you stole her from me"] You loved me first and i loved you first and You will always have the First place In my Heart [After Jayden of course] He stole that spot from You! 

Mama 

Mama- Spice girls 

The Only song that comes to mind when i think Of you! 

How many times we havnt bumped heads! even now! our personalities are so similar, the same stubborness the same want to be RIGHT, and even The intelligence. Only Now I see where Everything You used to say Came from and I can see things more clearly I Love you!

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Day 23 → Something you wish you had done in your life.

I wish I would have enlisted In the Army Served my country for 4 years and then started My life, I am still Youg and can do it I just cant Fathom leaving My LO maybe when he is % and can better understand mommy being Gone, and while he is away at school.

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Day 22 → Something you wish you hadn’t done in your life.

Everything I've done in Life I wanted to do at that point In time, would I change it if it meant changing today No, But One thing i did Do that I can't Fathom Is Hurting someone. I wish I Hadn't Gotten Involved with a guy Who was Already Spoken For, Although The relationship started by him pursing me and due to his Lies [and Wouldn't have happened had he started with IM Taken] I share the Blame for not ending It more quickly after finding out. It is Something, that made me grow as a person, and i would Not want to experience that sense of Betrayl and the Hurt I caused another living person. I do sometimes feel Guilty when i see how Happy The Mr. and I are and How Hurt I would be if some one came in to wreck that. But all things Happen for  a reason.

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Day 21 → (scenario) Your best friend is in a car accident and you two got into a fight an hour before. What do you do?

Wow! god forbid that ever happen but, I would immidiately say a prayer for her and her family, Contact her Family to find out where she is at, and go Visit, after all all GREAT relationships Have their ups and downs! a healthy Relationship needs Fighting and bickering.

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Day 20 → Your views on drugs and alcohol.

I'm Against ILLEGAL Drugs [there should be harsher Laws and Punishment for people caught using and Distributing them], All For OVER THE COUNTER andPERSCRIPTION drugs [lol], and all for Alcohol in MODERATION [Social drinking] TOTALLY AGAINST ABUSIVE ALCOHOLICS!![They should have MANDATORY REHAB]

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Day 19 → What do you think of religion? Or what do you think of politics?

"You can tell the size of your God by looking at the size of your worry list. The longer your list, the smaller your God"

Not Much else to say...  We face Challenges as Tests and well We all just need to get through them doesnt mean we are bad people, but when things get tough Faith In god is how I get through it [Now the mr. whole different story]

Now Politics hahaha NO COMENNT

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Day 18 → Your views on gay marriage. 

Don't Ask Don't Tell... It really Doesn't Bother me. I am No One to Judge who you are or who You should be with [If hubby were a Woman... Hmm who knows... lol but thankfully he is a Man] I actually Went to my grandparents restaurant a week or so Back and saw a Gay couple who had a son [ A son My sons age! How cute] they just looked so happy.. One thing that does bother me as well as others is PDA i dont care who it Is PDA is Not cute, Sexy, or appealing to ANYONE so keep It for the bedroom!

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Day 17 → A book you’ve read that changed your views on something.

The Bible Simple as that. Anytime im feeling like things are getting to hard I read from it and It calms me down and makes me feel at peace with myself and with things around me....

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Day 16 → Someone or something you definitely could live without.

this is Simple! DRAMA {although not always Unavoidable}

I could Definitely live without any of my Ex boyfriends including knowing anything about them or ever talking to them again, Also adding in there the Mr.'s exes/stalkers lol pretty Much I could Live With Out any one that Brings Unnecessary Drama!! or High school drama

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Day 15 → Something or someone you couldn’t live without, because you’ve tried living without it

Well Ill do both as far as "Something" Ill say Laptop [which of course has to come with internet] I probably could live with out it But wouldn't want to. i had to do with out internet for 2 weeks while the Mr. was Underway during My pregnancy that was CRAZY I do everything Online! so I have had to live without it and i was damn near ready to go insane.

As for "Someone" I'd say My LO! i have not tried living with out him but I cant be away from him for too Long. Even while at work I call to check in visit during Lunch and rush home to play with him [Of course when im with him He annoys the daylights out of me.. But then gives me that Little gap toothed smile and its all better]

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Day 14 → A hero that has let you down. (letter)

A Hero???? hmmm... its a Tuffy. ive had several people let me down none that i would consider a hero.Ill think about this one and be back later during the day to post.

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Day 13 → A band or artist that has gotten you through some tough ass days. (write a letter.) 

Wow! as soon as I read this Only one thing came to Mind... Deployments! No Communication with Your SO For days no Phone Calls and then Hearing about something Horrible happening While they are Gone Ugh the worst feeling ever. Before the Mr. I Dated a Guy who was Gone for about a year and a half, we grew up together and we were "Gonna get married" [ as all Kids/Teens Plan to do with their BF...] well this was decided since we were like 10! funny thing was I couldn't stand him as a kid He just annoyed me but as I got older like 8 or 9 we turned into Best friends and at 10 we decided we were going to get married! of course we weren't even BF/Gf yet but "We were going to get married". Well after a few years of dating being friends and finally starting a Serious relationship he Enlists in the U.S Army only to find out he will soon be deployed! My heart nearly broke the feeling I got was indescribable! But I sent him off With a Promise that I'd be here when he got back as I always had been as His Best friend. he didn't want to be selfish and make me wait but it didn't matter, as promised I waited [he was no Longer My BF] but i Decided I would not date Until he came Home. I stayed true to that. 

The song that Got me through this although it depressed me gave me some sort of comfort that i was not the only one going through this was "Come Home Soon" by SheDaisy. The smile on My face when I saw him Come through Those doors at work was big enough to make my face hurt! Although Feelings had changed during that year and a half and I could no longer see him as a BF, he is still and will Always continue to be my Best Friend... [Im sure My darling Mr. will have something to say about this Post]

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Day 12 → Something you never get compliments on.
My feet! i get Compliments on shoes, heels, toes, etc. but never my feet themselves lol [its cuz they're big isn't it! Damn it!! j/k  but seriously they are!]

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Day 11 - Something people seem to compliment you the most on.

My eyes, i get alot of compliments on My eyes. On how big they are light they are the naturally curled eye lashes and the Low Maintenance Eyebrows [Never have to get them waxed]

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Day 10 → Someone you need to let go, or wish you didn’t know

hmm i dont know. i dont think im holding on to any one, and im glad I know all the people that i do beacause theyve all taught me lessons i needed to learn. [ I would say My angels But Ive accepted they are gone although I will continue to celebrate their Expected Birthdays, The onli Other thing I cant seem to get over is the death Of my Puppy Mini, Every where I Look there is a photo of her and a memory of us]

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Day 09 → Someone you didn’t want to let go, but just drifted

well this may sound Odd But I will say My brother [my little brother to be exact... Like it matters I Onli have 1 how confused can ya get hmm??] any ways Before I "Grew Up" and Moved Away My Brother and I were Super close! We did everything Together! I Coached his Soccer Team, Practiced with him and his friends, Assisted with with indoor soccer, Picked up His Tramp I mean Girlfriend dropped the hoe Girl Off, Picked him up from school early Just to go to the Pizza Hut Lunch Buffet, Scheduled Imaginary Doctors apt. to get him out of school early, EVERYTHING! when I moved away Things got harder he wanted me home and i would come Visit Often, When The SO and I got Engaged thats hwen we started drifting I mean he likes him But Its my Bro! On My Wedding Day He was so Red From crying as we recited our vows [he had Lost His Big sister] Now nothings the same i see him and its just hey! i Mean t could be back then he was like 13/14 now hes 17 and well hes "Grown" lol who knows but that Trampgirlfriend of his still comes around ugh seriously time for a new one hmm?!?!?

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Day 08 → Someone who made your life hell, or treated you like shit.

actually Im Glad to report that As hard as I am thinking I can't come up with anything! I asked the hubs and nothing LOL! I can Make a list for others, But First Off Im Very Choosey when it comes to friends so It is very Limited the people who know enough about me to cause harm to me and those few Would never do that, I do Have the occaisional annoying People who Internet stalk, Copy and what Not or the occassional Hubbys EX tryna Be all UP in My ISH but Nothing That I would call Hell Just CREEPY lol [Girl seriously Hes Mine you had your chance and couldnt handle yourself during deployment Now go back to your drug addicted, Cheating, Poor excuse for a dad BF and Hop Off my Hubbys Junk![I would say Its mean of me to put her Bussiness out there BUT Only She will know who she is so There, and either way I just DONT CARE]] Lol Now back to the topic NOPE No ones treated me like shit either maybe badly but no one i can be like WOW he treated me like ISH! lol so IM Glad and Well Id like to say sorry to those of you that Have been treated like shit or put through hell but, If its anything like the couple of people that I know that Have been treated like shit and have some one making their life hell, Then well You chose to put Yourself In that situation, because ONE TIME DOES NOT MAKE HELL Repeated times do and if you stick around for it well, You knew It was coming so No sorrys from Me [You should hear what I tell My sister]

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Day 07→ Someone who has made your life worth living for.

My Son. Every day I wake up to his smiles and I know that everything will be ok! no matter what hard times bring me he is the ONE that its all worth fighting for! He Kept my hope alive once I Lost my Angels in 08 and because of him it saved me from depression, I dont want to say I forgot them but it helped and still helps to think of my Angels less and whenever I do feel sad he is there to brighten up my day with his cute little gap between his still growing teeth lol. Definately the one thing In life that is Worth it all and more [If at all possible]

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Day 06 → Something you hope you never have to do

Hmmm Theres a few things Some Id rather not even think of But I Hope I never Have to Lose another baby. The Pain of having lost My Angels In My First pregnancy was so Devastating, and dont know How my Heart would handle it. The Other thing is I hope I never have to File for a Divorce. The SO and I are very Much In Love but Our Love is still "Fresh" I Mean we are Only Going On 3 years, and Ive seen people Married for years that just decide thats not the life they want to Live any More, although id like to think It could never Happen.. All things are possible

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Day 05 → Something you hope to do in your life

Honestly I would some day like to Go Over seas to do missionary work. There are so many countries and people who need help and when My LO gets Older I hope to some day Volunteer Some of My time

to travel and Help Out where my help is most needed.

I also hope to someday go Sky

Diving lol[But that is just that would be nice to do the missionary work is something that I am Passionate about doing in my Later Years]

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Day 04 → Something you have to forgive someone for

Honestly im Not too Much into holding Grudges I do remember Things [Like Forever] but I dont Burden Myself with stress like Not forgiving some One if they are truely sorry the deserve Forgiveness and another chance, and if they Dont care enough to want forgiveness then I Definately Wouldnt Waste my time caring Enough to Try amd worry about forgiving them.
People who lied to me, exes who cheated, either I forgave them or just didnt give 2 Ish's about then so.... Really no one lol!!! Makes sense right!?

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Day 03 → Something you have to forgive yourself for.

Losing My Angels. [I feel That In some way It had to do with My health.]

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Day 02

Something You Love about Yourself

My Eyes! I Love them, They are real good when it comes to make up they are Pretty Light brown and of course perfect vision lol and the compliments dont hurt either!

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Day 01 → Something you hate about yourself.

-I hate that My Hair is frizzy

-I hate my Big Feet [size 9]

-I hate that I can Be a bitch to some one and take no regards to their feelings

- I hate that when some one is a bitch to me I have to an even bigger bitch Back!

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